20 Years Later, She Finally Chose Jesus

I literally cannot believe that I turn 20 years old in less than a month. It's so hard to believe... Time goes by so fast... 

(This is gonna be a short one, but very important to me.) 

I'm not really sure where to begin. It's been a crazy year of life for me. 

I began my college education and am on the path to becoming and elementary school teacher. So hard to believe.  

I have hurt people, and I have been hurt.

I have lived for God, and I have backslid all in a short amount of time. 

I went from being on fire for God to drinking fireball whiskey instead. 

I went from going to church to going to parties. 

I went from having thoughts about heaven to thoughts about ending my own life. 

I went from living with a wonderful family to living on my own. 

I went from feeling loved to feeling lonely. 

I went from loving God to doubting Him. 

I've done so much in such a small amount of time that I can barely even wrap my mind around it. 

By the grace of God, He got my attention within a few dreams that He gave me. It has helped me to realize where I need to get back to. I'm slowly starting my climb back up the mountain, and I'm slowly starting to trust in Him again. 

If I've learned one thing about life, it's that it is full of choices. Whether or not you make the right choice is all up to you.  Choosing to walk with God is one of the best decisions and toughest decisions you will ever make. So, it's up to you. Choose the right path, or choose the wrong path. As for me, I choose to start down the right path again. I want to get back to where I used to be. I want to make it to heaven someday. I'm done living for the world. I'm done juggling my choices and riding the fence. I. Choose. Jesus. 

“I’m feeling terrible—I couldn’t feel worse! Get me on my feet again. You promised, remember? When I told my story, you responded; train me well in your deep wisdom. Help me understand these things inside and out so I can ponder your miracle-wonders. My sad life’s dilapidated, a falling-down barn; build me up again by your Word. Barricade the road that goes Nowhere; grace me with your clear revelation. I choose the true road to Somewhere, I post your road signs at every curve and corner. I grasp and cling to whatever you tell me; GOD, don’t let me down! I’ll run the course you lay out for me if you’ll just show me how.”

Psalm 119:25-32 MSG"

The Choice

I had a dream last night that I died. 

It started out with me at a giant house. 

I opened the door, and entered in. 

When I got inside, there was a wide variety of people. Different races. Different religions. Men, women, boys, and girls of all ages... 

But we all had one thing in common... 

We were all dead. 

As I looked around the room, I felt a ton of different emotions. I wasn't exactly sure where I was, but I knew it was a very important place. 

After about 10 minutes of just standing there looking around, a person comes up to me. She said, "Are you ready?" "Ready for what," I asked. "To choose." "Choose what?" "Where you're going next." "Oh, sure." "Great! Follow me!" 

So, I followed her even though I was still unsure of what exactly she meant by "it was time for me to choose." 

After walking down a long hallway, we finally arrive at a door. We walked in. 

The room we entered was huge. It was almost like a giant gymnasium, but I knew that's not what it was. 

"Okay, " the woman said, "Right through this door to your left, you will go to make your choice." 

She pointed me in the direction I needed to go, and as I approached the door, I began to feel nervous. 

I opened the door and walked in. 

The room is unlike any I've ever seen. It's white. Pure white. Like snow. 

The air is chilled and calm. 

I could breathe more clear than I ever had. 

I could see perfectly and my hearing was flawless. 

There were absolutely no problems in that room. 

After standing in there for 5 minutes, I see the door start to open... And who I see come through that door leaves me speechless... 

He was unlike anyone I had ever seen. 

He was perfect. 

He was everything and MORE than I could have ever even guessed He would be. 

I could not believe that Jesus Himself was standing right in front of me. 

He simply said this, "My daughter: you have not been living for me. You have been of the world, and your salvation has not been your main concern. There's so much more that I could say to you, but instead, I'm going to show you...." 

The room went dark. The chilled air became heavy and smoky. It was difficult to breathe regularly. I couldn't even see my hand in front of me. My ears were ringing and it hurt. 

Nothing about this room was good. Nothing. 

I hear the door creak open, and as it opens, I see nothing but fire. I feel nothing but sadness and despair. All I can hear are the screams of the others around me. 

I knew I was getting a sneak peak of Hell. 

Then... I woke up. 

When I woke up, I was sweating and breathing heavily. 

I know what choice it is that I have to make. 

Keep living for the world and go to hell? 

Or, give my life back to Jesus and go to Heaven? 

And that's that...... I have to choose. 

I HAVE to. Right now. 

And, I choose Heaven. 

It's gonna be a long journey, but I know I can do it. 

I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me.