After graduation, I have the opportunity to move to Indianapolis to live with one of my best friends. I am very excited to have this chance. The problem is, I keep fighting whether or not it is going to happen. I keep going back and forth between, "yes, I'm going," and "no, I'm not going." I've literally thought about it non-stop. I've made the lists of pros and cons, but that didn't help the decision; it just made it that much harder. Then, I had the idea that maybe I should go just for a trial period... But, if that didn't work out, then where would I go?! It's honestly one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make in my entire life. Yay for adulthood... not.
When I first got the offer to move, I was super pumped and started planning things: how I wanted my bedroom to look, where I would work once I got there, etc. I started looking on Pinterest for ideas for everything. I was for sure that I was ready for the big move. Nothing and no one was going to stand in my way... But, then doubt started to creep in, and fear of course. I started thinking that my friend and I would get tired of each other once we lived together for a while, and we would end up hating each other. I started to think that if I move, my friends here in New Castle would be mad at me. I started to feel scared that I was about to take this huge step and didn't really know what I was thinking. Then, I thought that if I backed out of moving that my friend would be mad at me for changing my mind. So, I just stopped thinking about it for a while.
Buuuut, gradution is in four days, so time is closing in, and I need to make a decision. I have heard an opinion from two different people who are super important to me about what I should do, and again, it didn't make the decision any easier. I honestly have noooo idea what I am going to do. I mean, this is my future we're talking about here. I know I don't need to be rushing into a decision, but I also can't exactly take my sweet time, either. I have prayed about this, but I have gotten absolutely no where. I am now to the point where every time I even think about having to choose, I just start doing something else and promise myself that I will decide later. Well, later never comes, and I just blow off making the choice. I have got to stop doing that, honestly.
So, "to Indy or not to Indy?" is still the question. I have not made a decision, and do not know when I will. All I know is that I need to decide kind of soon. I can't keep putting it off. I need to look at my pros and cons list, and maybe pray about them. I need to think about every single little important detail. Until the decision is final.... TO BE CONTINUED....
