"Don't You Worry, Child."

"Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life. (Philippians 4:6-7 MSG)" 

I stumbled across that verse this morning. It really hit me hard. 

And, while it really does speak for itself, let me just tell you: 

I know, it seems nearly impossible to be anxiety/worry free about things. We all do it. 

Buuuuut, if we take Paul's advice and turn our worry into prayers, just imagine the outcome! 

Whenever you start to worry or start to feel anxious, just stop what you're doing and pray. It'll help the situation. I promise. Let God and His peace guard your heart from anxiety/worry. 

Everybody Hurts

Hurt. 

An unbearable king of hurt. 

A pain like I've never experienced before. 

A pain that literally made me sick. 

It feels as though my heart has been ripped out of me, stomped on, catapulted onto the street, and run over by an 18-wheeler. 

It feels as though I've been repeatedly hit in the head with a hammer. 

My thoughts are everywhere. 

My nerves are on edge. 

My eyes are burning from the sobbing. 

My heart is shattered into a puddle of nothing. 

I feel a multitude of emotions. 

Anger. 

Rage. 

Frustration. 

Sadness. 

Hurt. 

Confusion. 

Depression. 

It's all hitting me so hard. 

It's destroying me. 

I have a headache the size of Texas. 

I feel so dead. 

Now, I know life's not fair, but this just isn't fair. 

It's not right that I'm being treated this way. 

I just don't deserve it. 

I am just gonna have to trust God on this one. 

I'm tired of trying to do it on my own. 

"Knock Knock!" "Who's there?"

"Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me." (Revelation 3:20)

Have you ever been at the point in your life where you just know that God is knocking on your heart? Have you ever been so busy with worldly pleasures that you didn't notice He was trying to enter? Yeah, me too. 

The pleasures of this world can be dangerous. Their temporary satisfaction can distract us from God's offer of lasting satisfaction. 

Please, I'm speaking from personal experience, don't let these things get in the way. Please don't start shutting God out. 

Leave the door of your heart constantly open to God. Listen for His knocking, and just let Him in. Letting Him in is your only hope for lasting fulfillment. 

Jesus is knocking on the door of our hearts every time we sense we should turn to Him. He WANTS us to turn to Him. He is very patient and persistent in getting us to do so; which He does by the knocking. He doesn't just break and enter. He is a gentleman. 

He allows us to decide whether or not we are going to open up. 

Don't think you are forever stuck on the other side of the door. Listen for His voice, and then answer. God is so amazing that He will accept you no matter what. 

No one can make you listen and answer, but I'm trying to make you realize how important it is. 

Your life can change for the better in a heartbeat. Trust me... Trust HIM! :) 

You won't regret it. I promise. 

I Am Free

I'm finally letting go.

I feel like a captive that's been set free.

A weight has been completely lifted from my shoulders.

I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel.

I'm one step closer to feeling God's presence again.

I'm one step closer to complete surrender.

I'm done fighting with God; I'm gonna listen to what He has to say.

I'm done ignoring His commands; I'm gonna obey Him wholeheartedly.

I'm going all in.

I'm raising my white flag in surrender.

My life is no longer my own.

God comes first, no matter what.

I'm so sick of trying to be fake.

From here on out, I'm gonna be as real and transparent as I can be.

I'm getting rid of all unforgiveness and bitterness.

I'm going to pray through the hurt and the sting.

I'm going to let God continue His mighty work in me.

I'm gonna allow Him to move, and not let myself get in the way.

I'm done arguing with Him.

I can't go on a second longer without living fully for Him.

I've never felt freedom so sweet.

I've never been so happy to let something go.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with one small step.

I've finally taken that step.

It felt amazing to let it go.

God has a purpose for every aspect of everything in my life.

He desires to work in and through me.

I am so thrilled that I am finally going to let Him.

I'm no longer going to sit around and waste my life.

I am going to spend more time in His Word, and I am going to let it inspire me.

I have a burning desire to know more about Jesus.

It's not gonna work when I try to make the changes myself.

I am finally letting Jesus in to make the changes because it actually works when He's the one to do it.

I'm letting Jesus take the wheel.

I am letting Him be the Author of my entire life.

"No more shackles.

No more chains.

No more bondage.

I am free."

Strengthen Me

Confused.
Scrambled.
Anxious.
Hurting.
Frustrated.
Frazzled.
Spinning.
Dazed.

My mind is in a number of places. It's so full of so much stuff.
It's all happening so fast, and all at once.
What's going on?!
Why am I fighting with myself?!
Why is everything all jumbled inside of my head?!
I just don't understand.

"For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a SOUND MIND." (2 Timothy 1:7).
Obviously, my mind being all weird and confusing isn't God's fault.
Obviously, the devil sees the progress I've made in my life, and he's trying to confuse me and hold me back.

Wake up call, devil.
You're not gonna win anymore.
You know your fate.
Stop trying to bring me down.
You don't have any power over me.
I don't belong to you.
I am a child of God.
I'm done letting you try to confuse me.
I. Am. Done. With. Your. Schemes.

Dear God,
I pray that You would give me the strength to fight the devil off. I pray that You'd give me the patience and kindness that I need in order to make it through. I know that with You, all things are possible, so please help me to live in that mindset, God. Continue to do a work in me, and do whatever it takes to get me to go all in. I am Your vessel, God. Use me. Strengthen me.
In Jesus' Name,
Amen.

"I Have Been Changed For Good"

As I look back on the past year and a half of my life, I am literally awestruck because of how far I have come. As I look back on the past month of my life, I am in even more shock because of the huge changes that I have made. It's just amazing that God has taken who I was, and turned me in to who I am. I am a part of God, and He is a part of me.

Now, on this journey, I have not even been close to doing this alone. God has provided so many people in my life to be on my side rooting me on and supporting me in any way that they can. And, I am forever thankful for each and every single person.

There's a song from the musical Wicked called "For Good" that goes,
"Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun,
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood.
Who can say if I've been changed for the better
But because I knew you.
I have been changed for good."

Because I know everyone that I know, I have been changed for the better AND for good.

To the Marshall's: You have showed me what a real family is like, and I can't thank you enough for that. You have all been such an inspiration to me in so many ways. You have allowed me to live in your home, and have accepted me as a part of the family. You have showed me a love and compassion that no one has ever showed me before. I cannot even begin to say thank you enough for everything that you guys have done for me. I love it that I FINALLY have someone to call "dad." It is the most amazing thing in the world. There's so much I want to say to you guys and thank you for. But, I literally cannot put it all into words what all you have done for me.

To Greg: I still don't think I have thanked you enough for helping me to pray through to the Holy Ghost. You encouraged me so much throughout that part of my journey. When I felt like shutting down, you helped me to let go. It may have taken a while for it to finally happen, but I'm so thankful that it happened because it's the best thing that's ever happened to me. So, here are a thousand thank yous, Greg, for helping me and for all the encouraging words you have given me.

To my TPLC family: Thank you all for being there for me and for supporting me. None of you turned your backs on me and none of you have judged me. If I could personally come up to each and every single one of you and thank you for being so amazing, I would. You all have showed me how to worship. You all have showed me how to pray. You all have showed me that it's okay that I'm not perfect. You all have showed me how to Love God, and how to Love People. So, thank you all for being life changers and for showing me who God really is.

To God: I thank You for placing all of these people in my life. I thank You for creating a burning passion for change inside of me, for filling me with Your wonderful Spirit, and for just being so amazing. You leave me speechless all of the time. You have continued to blow my mind with Your blessings and promises. Thank You, Jesus, for loving me. Thank You for changing me into a better person... a person after Your own heart.